I’ve been feeling very blah of late.
Physically, emotionally, spiritually.
And I’m really not sure why.
Well, actually, I do probably know. I just don’t really want to admit it to myself. These are some the reasons (I’m sure there are many more I haven’t thought of):
- too much chocolate
- too much alcohol
- too much cheese (sadly, this appears to be a thing)
- too few veggies
- too much rich food in general
- definitely not enough exercise
- a few too many periods of self-doubt from comparing myself to super legends rather than how far I’ve come in the last ten, five, three and one years
- definitely not enough exercise (I might even write this one a third time…)
- not enough time to just sit and smell the roses – I’m always doing something
- not enough thinking time
- allowing myself to be upset/annoyed/otherwise pissed off by the actions of people I have no control over – you know, stupid, rude and deliberately nasty people who I haven’t yet managed to eliminate from my life
- hormones all over the place after coming off the pill after a ridiculously long time (no, definitely NOT trying to get pregnant in case any of my loved ones reading this are wondering…)
- being in my mid-40s and no doubt starting to go through the beloved peri-menopause phase (really, really, really need a sarcasm font here…)
- not enough good quality sleep. Or even poor quality sleep. Not enough time in bed in general
- not enough time with The Accountant where it’s just been us hanging out – we haven’t had a holiday together in over two years
- stress from The Accountant having been unemployed for pretty much all of this year and a very large chunk of last year
- annoyed because far too many clothes don’t fit me – due to points one through six…
- did I say not enough exercise???
So what am I going to do about it I hear you ask?
Well, a few things, nothing drastic. Because drastic never works longterm. Or really even short-term.
To quote Michael Pollan, I’ll be eat[ing] food. Not too much. Mostly plants.
Also I will be cranking up my exercise – starting with walking for at least 30 minutes a day. Walking is my favourite form of exercise. It gives me thinking time, chatting time, podcast listening time. It exercises my heart and my whole body when I walk quickly and swing my arms (sometimes holding weights, often holding the shopping bag). Plus, I can look around and see all the pretty flowers, the changes in my neighbourhood, and see who else lives around me.
My preferred walking time is early-mid afternoon after lunch. Sadly, living in Brisbane, these are prime sunburn times, which I try and avoid at all costs. Not to mention it’s just too hot. Which means I need to drag my night-owl body out of bed by about 6am (can you hear me screeching?) so I get my daily vitamin D hit without risking another melanoma or any other form of skin cancer.
Getting up at 6am also means I need to go to bed earlier – ideally by 10pm so I get my very much needed eight hours.
I’m also going to try and spend a bit more time just doing nothing. Maybe talking to the #crazychickens. Hanging out with The Accountant. Planning a weekend away.
Do I need to go and talk to someone? Someone being a therapist of some sort. No, I don’t think so.
I’m attuned to my body and my emotions enough to know when I need to get help, and I’m not there yet. I know most of the causes of my physical blah, and my emotional and spiritual blahs are not at the point of needing external advice. Getting back to a better diet and regular exercise and time to smell the roses should fix most of those blahs. And I know that because I have been there before. And thankfully had fabulous support from wonderful people.
What about you? How are you tracking? Has your year been like mine? Too busy to focus on what’s really important? By which I mean YOU?
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This week is Mental Health Week. Some of you know that I’m volunteering with Hat Day, which this year is on Friday 9 October 2015. Hat Day is the initiative of Australian Rotary Health, the largest funding body of mental illness research in Australia.
It is easy to participate in this event … wear a hat … and donate to research!
Visit www.hatday.com.au to register a Hat Day FUNdraiser event and invite your friends, family and collegues to join in and to donate generously on your fundraising page.
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Facebook – www.facebook.com.au/hatdayevent
Twitter – @hatday (which I look after)
use the hashtag – #hatday15
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You know, I really needed to read this this morning. I am, and have been feeling much the same way you describe for most of year (and for many of the same reasons). Driving to work this morning , two words kept running through my head – Annus Horribilis.
So, thank you for putting it out there and making me realise that we all have challenges. It’s time to pick myself up and make some changes.
Hope you have a lovely day, Mel. x
I hear ya, sister. This list could be me: too much wine/cheese/sitting down instead of moving/crappy sleep… Throw in work issues and a broken down car and bingo! The perfect storm. My advice – be kind to yourself. As trite as that sounds it makes a difference. Appreciate all you have achieved and stop comparing yourself. You’re great.
You’ve started down the right path though, and that matters. I’ve been on a similar path since the last week of December and have learned a great deal. I’ve learned I CAN live without Coke Zero and now I love sparkling mineral water with muddled lime or lemon. I CAN go off the Pill (like you) and face being a ‘real woman’ again, even though it frequently hurts, drives my children crazy when my emotions go haywire and has changed my appearance in several ways. I CAN be craving free and no longer be a slave to sugar, carbs and empty calories. I CAN stick to my choices without feeling like others’ opinions need to matter.
What I’m still yet to learn is how to go to bed early without screen time, how to get my butt into gear to do those walks and how to put irrational anxiety to rest without medication. But just as with any walk, it’s all one step at a time.
Keep reaching out and asking others for (genuine) help and support. And don’t be dissuaded by false advice peddled by people who are envious of your efforts and can’t face them themselves. You’re doing well xx.
Well, your looking mighty fine Mel! Try a good steak with those greens (it’s filling). I hear you, it’s been a fast year & seem to have little time for breaks. I’ve had surgery, just to get a break. I thought that pretty desperate & nearly chickened out & booked a week down the coast instead. But it was necessary, I’m feet up & reading a book (your blog) & thinking about blogging.
You’ve had many adventures this last 2 years, I can recommend the most amazing secluded private getaway at Palm Bay, Long Island, off Shute Harbour. Not too exy, but Devine. Hope u can take the accountant to Paradise…
Thanks Mel for posting this. I’m glad you recognise the early signs of burnout quickly and yes, in our busy crazy lives we need to take stock occasionally and simplify our life.
I think I might follow your example!
Sorry to hear that you’re off colour Mel, but it sounds like you are on the right track to get yourself sorted. After 4 weeks of holiday and loads of restaurant meals, I’m going to need to embark on a modified eating plan myself – just as soon as I get home.